Plz don't remove my head!

Been months since I last posted. I'm still alive, guys and gals.

I just hadn't been motivated to post much with this account of mine. Gotten so into the roleplay writing things going on around LiveJournal, and I get very into it for months.

My life has been about the same. Nothing really big has happened, but that's quite all right. I'm never in a hurry to do much. I like cruising through life and soaking in all that I have. I'm just a content sponge, I suppose. *chuckle*

The board gaming group I go to has gotten bigger, so that's really good. My mom and I still love going every Friday night to see our hilarious friends over there. I'm really looking forward to going next Saturday at the board gaming store we all meet up at and just have some good times and laughs. We're making the owner of the place jealous because we laugh so much and he gets occupied with those Magic the Gathering players at their tournaments. Poor him.

Yeah, just went very geeky there for a bit.

The one friend who's INTJ is someone I still see once in a while at my bookstore. I'm always glad to see Tanya, and it's still sad we live so far away from each other. But I'm hopeful that will change for the better someday. Hey, it could happen!

Aside from all that, I'm looking forward to winter being over. It's snowed over here in MD quite a few times this month, and I've been done shoveling snow. Happy spring, everyone.

Eye Contact

It's been so quiet in here for so long.

Do you have trouble with eye contact or dislike eye contact? A psychologist told me that lack of eye contact had something to do with introversion, but I'm skeptical.
Plz don't remove my head!

Long while no post... Been so occupied and busy, but I'm back.

It's been overall smooth sailing for me. Been working hard and keeping cool from the summer heat. I can't really complain. Some of you may remember that I had an idea to try and meet other introverts by starting my own tabletop meetup location at my bookstore. No luck, but going to the High Tide Games store about 40 minutes away every Friday night for meetup has turned out really well! Met some new people who like the same games my mom, myself, and the rest of the six core members like.

I wish I could see more of my friend Tanya, but she lives so far away. She is an INTJ, and I've felt connected to her quite a bit. Her internet's wonky because the emails I tried to send wouldn't. So, next time we should just exchange cell phone numbers. Once in a while she comes to my store and we talk and hang out a bit. And then she purchases a pile of books. I did tell her about High Tide, and hope to see her there on a Friday sometime. :D

I've been reading a lot, and I aim to improve more on my manga style drawing, when it comes to people. Trying not to get too sucked into DS Lite gaming since I got these things to do.

I'd also like to mention this book I found and kept for myself on a day Mom and I did some book shopping. It's titled "The Happy Introvert" by author Elizabeth Wagele. It's both a motivating and interesting nonfiction book that explores the inner richness of introversion, and there are details on the differences between us and the extraverts. There's self-help tips too. In addition to this, there are little amusing cartoons and some other things scattered about the pages. It's a pretty good read. I'd recommend it!


I just got back home from helping my mom with a few things since she still can't get around that well. She is still recovering from her surgery. Well my mom decided that it would be a great time again to start talking about dad and how much she hates him.

Today is not the day apparently since I had just about had enough and I went crazy and started to tell her how I felt and how this was putting all the stress on me. She goes fucking crazy and goes on to how I wasn't the one that got divorced and apparently I'm not allowed to feel anything or to feel hurt. So I completely shut the fuck down and let her talk about all that she wanted. I'm very very very hurt right now, to the point of just deciding to repress everything, cause I'm not fucking allowed to show how I feel ever again. She said that I was holding a rage in me that would seriously hurt someone some day and that I needed to go see a psychologist.

I just don't fucking get it anymore. I just don't. I've tried to show how I feel and how much this is making me hurt but apparently she started yelling, "It is all about you isn't it?" and a bunch of bullshit..

The other kids

High school can be a different experience depending on who you are.

If your a jock or cheerleader you might have a good one.

But what if your not?

What if your the kid who is so shy, their virtually invisible to everyone else.

Or the girl who cuts herself to make herself feel better.

For some reason these kids are often over looked.

Not just in real life but in movies and TV shows

Adolescence is the time where we try so hard to fit it and for some us we cant be like everyone else as much as we try.

If your a guy your suppose to be able to an alpha male and get any girl you want.

If your a girl your suppose to have perfect hair, perfect make up and gossip about each other and boys.

I’m not saying those people are bad, but there often overshadowed by the outsider.

Like the kid who stays home on weekends, because he has no friends to go out with.

Or the girl who is slightly overweight and wishes she could be a size two.

These kids have a voice, but no one seems to either listen or pay attention.

There the kids who dread getting up and going to school

The kids who get picked on for being slightly weirder than normal kids.

I can tell you how many times I stay up at night wishing I was like everyone else, but alas I am not.

I am the kid who never got invited to parties.

The kid who nobody will remember cause I was so quiet.

The kid who was constantly harassed for being different.

I think its time someone like us to speak up and say your not alone

But hey what do I know.



The first time I get to see my dad in two weeks and I don't get to say a damn word to him. Why?

Because my manager is a motor mouth. She knew damn well that I hadn't seen my dad in two weeks and I wanted to talk to him. She ran her mouth for a solid half hour and then he left and it was time for all of us to go home. My blood preasure is so high right now that I feel dizzy. I'm so mad right now.

And what did she feel that she had to talk to him about non stop? The show Duck Dynasty.... why?

Why? Why did she do this to me?

I can't call him at night, cause he turns his phone off when he gets home... and also he doesn't stick around at the store long enough for any of us to get a word out to him. This time he stayed around and she was being a selfish crazy fuckwit.. sorry for the language I'm just REALLY mad.

I think I am going to draw for a little bit..

Silence vs. noise

I'm an introvert, unless I'm around my friends and then I can be pretty talkative. At work though, I'm introverted. This is a bit of a problem, since one of our employees is a rather loud mouth and really doesn't let anyone get anything said. It drives me crazy, she talks all the time, exaggerates about everything, and is always overly dramatic and then gets a little pissed off when someone can actually get something said between her breaths.

Why are some people like that? Why can't they respect the people that like to be quiet and would rather stay inside their own mind?
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